Jamielle Silvia
ENGL 0250-154
H. Susi
October 2, 2011
Dear Dads: Save Your Sons
Christopher N. Bacorn’s essay Dears Dads: Save Your Sons is about a 15 year old boy whom his father had left him 4 years ago. After his father left he became involved in drinking alcohol, gang membership, failing grades, and violence. He hurt someone in a fight and charges were pressed against him along with assigned counseling. When the counselor met with the boy he soon realized this entire time the boy needed a man in his life. Someone to love him, shows him guidance, and spends time with him. Boys who grow up without a father often act out because they haven’t been disciplined or been taught how a man should act.
Most children end up with a step parent while growing up either because of divorce or the parent has not been there from the start. Bacorn said “Of course there are men who do spend time with children, men who are covering for all those absentee fathers.” When children grow up without their parents it has a big affect on the children whether they want to believe it or not. Children need to be in a healthy environment while becoming who they are because children need love, attention, and a lot of care. This essay shows just what affects it can have on a child because there was no guidance. Children learn right from wrong through the parents and if they are not there the children will never learn.
In this story this boy needed his father to love him, show him right from wrong, and guide him into becoming a man. A father that lacks responsibility himself is not setting a good example for his son. This man walking away from his family has just created a bunch of confusion and anger for his son. If this world had more fathers who want to spend time with their kids they would not have to go looking for a sense of belonging. Most young boys who grow up without a father usually try to fit in with other boys by most likely joining a gang. This boy will probably do the same thing his father did to him because that is what he is used to. I think of this as a cycle because he could either break the cycle and become a man and a good father or become just like his own father because he doesn’t know any better.
When I was in high school I took 3 years of child development. In this class I learned how important it is for kids to grow up with the same sex parents. Most girls want to be just like their mom when they are young and same goes for boys. Little girls need a woman they can look up to and boys need a man to do the same. Seeing how their parents act gives them a good overview of how people should act. Disciplining you children teaches them right from wrong and the proper way to act.
I can relate to this story in many ways. I have always had another man take care of my brother, sister and I. My father has always been there in our life but only on the weekends. Another man watched us grow up, took care of us when we were sick, got us ready for school, but never my real father. In a way I think it has made me stronger because it is hard to take commands from another man who is not your own father. When I think about it now I am grateful that I have had wonderful father figures because I would not be half the grown up I am today. I do miss my father very much till this day and love him more than any other man in my life but he has never done anything for me. I have other men in my life who has acted more like a father to me then my real dad and it makes me sad because if he had the same chance as they did he would have been a great father. Although my dad was not around much when we were younger he is certainly making up for it now.
hi
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